you know who has charm. but can you acquire it? properly, you can't, because it's an originality of touch you have to be born with. or it's something that grows naturally out of another quality, like the simple desire to make people happy. certainly, charm is not a question of learning palpable tricks, like wrinkling your nose, or having a laugh in your voice. on the other hand, there is an antenna, a built-in awareness of others, which most people have, and which care can nourish.but in a study of charm, what else does one look for? apart from the ability to listen--rarest of all human virtues--apart from warmth, sensitivity, and the power to please, there is a generosity which makes no demands. charm spends itself willingly on young and old alike, on the poor, the ugly, the dim, the boring, on the last fat man in the corner. it reveals itself also in a sense of ease, in casual but perfect manners, and often in a physical grace which springs less from an accident of youth than from a confident serenity of mind. any person with this is more than just a popular fellow; he is also a social healer.

　　charm, in the end, is a most potent act of behavior, the laying down of a carpet by one person for another to give his existence a moment of honor. it is close to love in that it moves without force, bearing gifts like the growth of daylight. it snares completely, but is never punitive. it disarms by being itself disarmed, strikes without wounds, wins wars without casualties--though not, of course, without victims.

　　in the armory of man, charm is the enchanted dart, light and subtle as a hummingbird. but it is deceptive in one thing--like a sense of humor, if you think you've got it, you probably haven't.